Better Day

Today has been a good day.

My house looks like poop, but it has still been a pretty good day.

Last night when I was telling Charming about my awful day, I found myself going over all the cute funny things the kids did. I realized it wasn't so bad. And I felt really shameful about how I behaved yesterday. I think that helped make today better. Plus I decided not to stress about stuff. Like keeping the house clean or being a creatively fun mom.

Ethan even said wow when I was sweeping up. He recognized my mad broom skills.

So I was talking to the Daring One today and thinking about all the cool things she does up there in the rainy place with her posse. It got me thinking about that mom's group that I am not going to join. Maybe I'll just start my own. Call it the Cool Mom's Club. Or maybe,the No Socially Inept, Unfriendly Mom's Allowed Club. Or that should be one of the requirements anyway. Yeah, sounds good.

I miss the rainy place today. But I am still happy anyway.

Sleep

I am not a morning person.

I would love to be able to get up in the morning before my children do. It would be so wonderful to be able to do a little reading, meditate, ponder and freshly begin my day. People who say they get up before their children, I am convinced, have children that sleep through the night by three months and have children that wake up after the sun comes up. Or, they are crazy. Not sure which.

I could never get up before my kids for several reasons:

1. I am not a morning person. I wake up slowly and am groggy for the first hour of my awake-ness.

2. Do you know what time my kids get up? (Hint: Before the sun rises....)

3. I am a sleep fiend. Here is an idea of the kind of sleep I need:
11 hours: divine
10 hours: heavenly
9 hours: wonderful
8 hours: minimum
7 hours: pushing it
6 hours: non-functioning, nausea, achiness, tyranny, unhappy mom

So, there you go. I would love to, but it will not happen.

Also, I love it when my children love me and want me. But not at 6 am. At 6 am they can have Daddy. Mommy is not available. (Okay, so I am available if I feel really bad for them, like this morning. Of course, now I am feeling bad. Not enough zzzzz's.)

Hopefully today goes better than yesterday!

Today Bites

Well, in case you were wondering, today has pretty much been crappy.

The house: a mess.

The children: made said mess

The mom: a mess

I am officially the world's meanest, most unhappy mom. (Yes, I am trying a little no anti-depressant experiment). My throat is sore from all the yelling. I yelled when they spilled orange juice on the floor, and then when they did it two more times. I yelled at myself when I couldn't figure out how to hang the new curtains. I yelled when they didn't do what I asked them to do.

I even tried to do something "fun" with them and it just turned out awful. I ended up getting more frustrated than I had any fun.

I am an awful mom and I can't figure out what is wrong with me. :(

Sorry that this is not very happy or upbeat.

I probably shouldn't even post it.

But I am going to anyway.

Not a halfway gal

Okay, so I think my problem is this: I can't do things half way. It's all or nothing for me.

Example 1: My house.

People say, "relax, get used to having a semi-messy house." Well, for me, I am either going to keep it very clean or it's going to hell in a handbasket. I can't just have it semi-clean. When it gets dirty, my tendency is to just throw up my hands and be done with it. Let the tornado come! I am never going to clean again! The extreme clean aint happening with toddlers, and the messy mess is well, messy(and existent most of the time).

Example 2:Creative Memories.

In my life as a sales person so far, I have discovered that I am a wretchid, rotten salesperson. This is mostly because I have a hard time separating my emotions from the business side of things. This is one of those businesses that in order to sustain it, you really have to go at it. Well, after going at it for awhile, I get depressed when it isn't turning out just right. My inclination? Walk away. Break the wrist and walk away. This is no way to go about things I am convinced.

Example 3: ummmm

Okay, well there is no example three. Well, okay, Christmas Decorations. Right now, I have one measly little light up tree in my front window. It looks kinda silly. All out there alone, a sort of half hearted, cheapo way of showing my neighbors my holiday spirit. It is pitiful. I am either going to take it down, or find a way to decorate the front of our house like a landing strip. Just no in between, folks.

What is my problem? I am constantly going from one extreme to the other. Can you tell I am not having a great day? Maybe tomorrow I'll be cheery and happy. Maybe tomorrow I'll be bluer than bluey blue. Maybe tomorrow we'll make a million dollars, and then I can be a lady of leisure and get a maid. Maybe tomorrow.... Well, you get it. Unknown. Wild.

Any ideas on getting some balance here?

Monday Morning Confessions

Get Ready!

1. I'm not going to win NANOWRIMO
Can we hear the death knell? Sorry, guys. I have just under 25,000 words and you know what? I aint gonna make it. But I am happy. I have done more than I ever have on one of my "novels" and I know I will finish this one now. Just not by November 30th.

2. I have a cross nasal contamination fear
Okay, maybe this is gross, but, oh well. I sometimes get nosebleeds, so in order to prevent them I put vaseline in my nostrils each night before bed using a Q-tip. (Yes, I use the name brand, all else do not meet the standard.) I use one end for one nostril and the other end for the other nostril. One tip must never be used in both nostrils. That would be just, well, gross, I guess. As if there is such a thing as cross nasal contamination.

3. After a lovely Thanksgiving, I am glad to be home
I was really glad we saw family over the holiday, but I waffle a bit sometimes, you know. When I got to Washington, I was all, "Ooooh, I wish we lived here." Then as we were leaving I felt happy to be away, living my own life. Then on the 12 hour turned 14 hour drive because of pooty road conditions, I was like, "yeah, maybe living close to family would be good." But after we got home to our sparkly clean house, I was oh so happy to be home. Because like it or not, this is our home, here in Utah. And it really is starting to feel more like it. :) Thank goodness.

My mommy has high speed internet

Well, we made it to the Evergreen State. 12 hours. 2 toddlers. 1 magic DVD player. And Teletubbies. Wonderful, wonderful, life saving Teletubbies.

All in all, a pretty good trip.

The children woke up at 5:30 am Washington time this morning. I was grateful they made the change to Pacific Standard Time instead of their usual Mountain Standard Time, otherwise we would have been up at 4:30 am. As it is, we are currently hanging out downstairs in my mom's basement (where we slept) and waiting out the morning until a reasonable time when other people won't mind being woken up.

Which brings me to the reason I am posting.

My mommy has high speed internet. At home we use dial-up. This is fine because dial-up only costs us 10 dollars a month. But oh, how I love the high speed. Now that I am here and using it, I realize what it is that I truly want in this life. I have a need for speed.

I don't know if the high speed will make me spend less time on the internet or more. But I think probably I could spend less time, since I wouldn't waste countless minutes waiting for things to load. I got a tiny tingle up my spine this morning when I went to a few blogs and they came up instantly. With all their pictures and everything.... Ooo-hoo-hoo--hoo. It gives me shivers just thinking about it. I love it, love it, love it! I must find a way to have a high speed connection of my very own....

Charming said we could only get it if we needed it for business or something. Give us some business if you want to help me out....

My house looks good, but don't open the closet

I believe very strongly in the "visual clean."

This means that when in a hurry to get the house sparkly and fresh looking (like yesterday, since I am priming for a road trip) I focus on getting clutter out of sight, cleaning the floors and countertops, making beds, but not necessarily on organization. If something doesn't have a place, but I am sick of looking at it, it gets shoved into a drawer, cupboard, pantry or closet.

During "visual cleaning" time, I avoid unloading the dishwasher and folding laundry. Dishes in a dishwasher are out of sight and so is laundry in the dryer. Laundry needing folding but not in the dryer can easily be put in a basket and shoved in a closet, to be Dealt with Later. Oh, how I love the visual clean.

So, while right now, I have a great looking house-- very clean, very fresh-- don't open the closet, or the drawers or the pantry. They are not clean, not organized and very messy. But, I don't care. All I care about is the visual clean. The visual clean makes me feel peaceful and content. When my house is visually clean, I am a Very Happy Mom. A Very Happy Mom, indeed.

Fessing Up

Here we go:

1. It's 9 am and my children have already eaten play dough and ice cream
E was feeding small bits of play dough to S. I was shocked. Then E got the ice cream out of the freezer, and said, "Look, I found it! I found ice cream!" After their second scoop and they wanted more, I did insist that they eat cereal instead. This went over better than expected.

2. I have a hard time being content with where I am at
I think I get this from my mom. She has had numerous jobs, for one reason or another, she wasn't happy with them and quit. During her last job search she complained that no one wanted to hire her because of her "history." She's been at her new job about a month now and recently said to me, "They have mice here. I don't know how much longer I can take this job." I love you Mom!

3. I sometimes feel guilty about how blessed I am
I don't know why this is. But right now, I have a couple of friends with bad marriages/impending divorce and I have a friend who's been married over ten years and hasn't been able to have children. I just feel bad. Like, I am flaunting my blessings if I talk about my kids or my hub.

4. I pretty much "have it all" but, I still want more
Is this bad? Yes, I think it is. I have great kids, a great hub, a great house, yada yada. But what I really want is to be in Washington living near my extended family, and this keep sme from being really happy. I think this goes back to number 2. Any ideas on how I can work on this?

5. I just saw Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith and I can't stop thinking about it
It was great! It dealt with so many universal themes, like creating what you fear, and how you can't control everything, and oh! I just can't get it out of my mind. The storytelling was so excellent and seamless. Loved it!

6. This is not really a confession, but I have seen one of these in my neighborhood.
Am I the first? Anyone else seen one?

My Creative Memories DEE-ZASTER

I had my Creative Memories Open House today.

Disaster. Major Disaster. I have fallen into a depressed little hole of rejection and failure.

I spent too much money getting the thing set up for one. Money for the motivating free gift to give attendees. Money for the 200+ flyers I took to everyone's house. Money for the refreshments....

I spent too much time on it. Time getting my house clean. Time going to borrow stuff from my upline. Time to make the refreshments. Time to distribute 200 flyers. Four hours spent sitting around come show time.

Two people came.

Two.

NEVER AGAIN.

And the thing that makes it worse is that everyone else keeps saying how easy it is to do this.

Yo! Have Joy.

My children have been playing with the Christmas decorations. I walked in the front room, and saw (no joke) this:



It should look like this:



So, YO! Have joy.

This is not to be here

Okay, so today is supposed to be a non-computer/internet/blog day.

But, out of necessity, this will not be so, as I have An Announcement.

It's been two years, but today it happened. I received a visit from Aunt Flo. This is good and bad as it means several things:

1. I am not pregnant. :)

2. My crazy, sobbing, screaming, stomping moods can be attributed to Flo's visit :}

3. I am having crazy, sobbing, screaming, stomping moods. :(

That said, I went to this Mom's Club thing today, and I have officially decided not to join up with them. It's not a good fit for me, I don't think. Of the twenty, two ladies have been friendly to me, and I as am having a hard time making friends here as it is, I just don't think I need to be with a group where I have to exert massive efforts to get to know people.

When we got home the kids were crabby, and then I stepped in a puddle of water on the floor. In trying to determine where the water came from, I discovered it was not water at all.

No, my friends, not water. Not water at all. He-who-will-not-be-named left a fluid on the floor. It was not water. Not water at all. Nuff said.

But in other news, I earned some commission from Barefoot Books. $7.74, people. Big money. Of course I will never see the money until I earn about $30 in commission. Which means if I want my $7.74, I have to keep selling their books. Hmmm.....

Well, my Creative Memories open house is tomorrow. I put out almost 200 flyers. I fear no one will come. This will make me sad, I am sure. But-- we are going to Washington on Wednesday and we got a DVD player for the car so I AM PUMPED!

Hope everyone else is having a less weird day than I am.

A gift to you

My friend came over this morning to visit another friend with me (for the Mormons-- we were going visiting teaching). I was not ready to go and my house was a disaster. While in my frazzled rush to get going I said to her, "tell me your house looks like this sometimes, too." She said, "my house looks like this all the time. It actually makes me feel kind of good to see someone elses house like this." So there you go. That's what I've been saying for years. So, to all my faithful readers, a gift:





I hope it brings you JOY!

Funny E

E has learned how to wink, apparently. He was looking at Charming this morning saying, "Look at my Eye, Daddy! Look at my Eye." He looked like he was squinting really hard, then he said, "It's sleeping!" and then he laughed.

In other news, last night during the only time I had to work on NANOWRIMO, I kept getting phone calls. I never get calls! So, I fell short of my daily word count, but I did have some fun conversations, so that was good.

NANOWRIMO word count: 23, 663

I am oven burner operation challenged

Okay, so we've been in our new house with our new oven for, like, 4 1/2 months now, right? Apparently, I am still having difficulty remembering which knob goes to which burner-- even though they are clearly marked.

Well, so today I-- ah heck, I'll just show you the pictures:

I was making french toast and bacon you see, and I needed to quickly put the butter onto the grill so I flung the lid onto the burner in my haste. The burner at the time was not on. I then put the bacon pan onto the rear burner and turned on the front burner, the wrong burner so it turned out-- yes I turned on the burner where the lid to my margarine substitute was. A disaster of these proportions has not occurred since high school when I forgot I was making ramen and the water boiled off. The pan burned clear through, hot metal dripping into the well, drip pans, actually. I remember the house smelled like metal for a long time. This was not as bad as that, but I may still need to replace the burner. And I feel like a total dork.

The Boy

So, E had a little friend over yesterday--K. It was fun. E loves K and K loves him back. Check out a piece of this conversation:

E: K, do you need to go potty?
K:No
E: Why not?
K: (Silence)
E: K, look me in the EYES! Do you need to go potty?
K: No.
E: Do you want to change your diaper?

Hmmm.... Think there's been a lot of potty talk in our house lately?

Okay, so then this morning, we were upstairs when Charming left via the garage. We heard the garage door opening and had this conversation:

E: What's that?
Me: The Garage Door.
E: Bronto- saur
Me: (Yes it kind of sounds like a dinosaur) No, Ga-Rage Door
E: Rama store?
Me: No, G-a R-age Door
E: Rama store, bronta saur, rama store, bronta saur

I am pretty sure at this point they both thought we were going to the Rama Store since S wanted her coat and E started begging for his.

And a bit later this morning I hear the dreaded screams and whines from little S. I look over and see her sliding across the vinyl flooring holding onto a small lunch box with E at the other end. It would have been quite funny had the mute button been on. Needless to say, E took a time out, and I called Charming to find out that none had eaten breakfast. Hmm... That explained a lot of the whiny-ness. After the time out I forced E to the table, (he was screaming NO BREAKFAST!) where he ate 3 bowls of cereal.

S however dumped 2 bowls on the floor and ate but one bowl.

NANOWRIMO count: 21,477

Education and Being a Good Mom

I need to not be blogging right now, but this has been bugging me and I just have to get it out there. After this I will get back to my regularly scheduled life.

I want to start a music class/pre-school for 2 1/2- 3 year olds. I want to do it to get my kids in some kind of structured music environment and also make a little extra money. I want to do 2-3 year olds because there really isn't much out there for them in terms of preschool and I think some parents want/need it. E turned 3 in October, so there you go.

I talked to a friend today who also does a pre-school. She is a dear woman whom I adore and admire. Talking to her today, however we got in a bit of a disagreement. I feel bad about it, but still think that I am right. The debate was whether or not parents would want to be away from their 2 year olds for four hours a week. Here's how it went down:

She: I just wouldn't want to be away from my 2 year old that much a week. You're a stay-at-home mom for a reason-- what would be the point if you are going to send them off for four hours a week?

Me: I see what you are saying, but I think it is only your opinion. When I had my postpartum depression, I would have loved to have four hours away, because I had such a hard time handling my life.

Okay, so it was close to that. But here's the thing, and you may or may not agree, I do much better as a mom when I have time away from my kids. (Naptime does not count.) Not necessarily because I need the "me time" but more because when I am absent from the children for an hour or two, I miss them a little. When I get back I appreciate them more--I play with them more. When they are with me all the time (maybe this makes me a bad mom) it's easy to sort of ignore them and let them do their own thing. So for me, if I had four hours a week away from E (or even S at her wee 15 months) I would be in Heaven, and I guarantee they would get way more quality time with mom.

Okay, so the other thing is this-- my friend's preschool curriculum doesn't focus on academics at all. It focuses mainly on social skills and I think that is really cool. Rock on. However, her reasoning is this: why teach them the alphabet when they are just going to learn it in kindergarten? This attitude I take issue with.

My son knew his alphabet and all his numbers by age 2. At three he knows upper case, lower case, and most of the sounds they make. In this I think he is somewhat exceptional,and he mostly learned it by his own choice, but as a parent I am concerned that his education challenge him enough. Saying that "they'll just learn it in kindergarten" sort of dumbs things down a bit, don't you think? Shouldn't we say, "let's teach it now, and hold our education system to a higher standard"? I think American schools don't expect enough of children as it is.

My friend Andrea is sending her daughter to a private school because her daughter Et, at four year old struggled with her alphabet-- mostly that she was not interested in it. Now at 5, in kindergarten, she is reading. Isn't that great? Andrea is going to start sending her son to the same school because he is not doing as well in our public education system.

Now, being that I cannot afford private school, I might send my chickadees to a charter school. Andrea doesn't like the idea of charter schools, because she doesn't want to have to be involved. Her reasoning, which I also don't agree with, is that teachers go to school so they can be educators, so that she can send her children to school and let them be taught by the experts. But shouldn't we be involved as parents in the education of our children? Her not wanting to help out is because she has another young child, but I don't know. I would still want to be involved-- hey maybe while she volunteers at her kid's school, she could bring her two year old to my school. There you go. Four hours a week. Very useful.

Am I way out there?

NANOWRIMO count: 19631

Some Confessions (Yes, I know it's Tuesday)

Here we go, better late than never....

1. I have fallen behind on my NANOWRIMO
I know! No need for scolding. But S did have croup.... I still wrote then actually, I slowed down after she got better. Last night I was OFFICIALLY out of steam for the project but then I managed to get in another 1500 words or so. So it continues.

2. I have more dreams about ex-boyfriends than I do about my husband
Here's the thing with this one folks-- when I wake up I realize that the "ex" really was the hub, and the hub of the dream was an "ex" who I can't stand. I feel badly about these dreams, but what can I do? I think what it is is that I think of Charming as kind of a summation of all the boyfriends I've had. Does that make sense? He is like the perfect blend of all of them. Hence, why I chose him to marry. That and he proposed...

3. Whenever I hear the baby crying I assume the boy has done something to her
Yes, I am not always in the same room as the children. If I hear S crying or whining, I automatically yell, "E! What did you do to her?" It's horrible I know. I ought to know better too, since I am also an oldest child.

4. I have decided that family is more important than things
This is not a new revelation, nor is it probably much of a confession-- but hear this--one of our goals this year was to buy a house-- something we recently did here in Utah. I am grateful for this house, I love it, and I love home ownership. But after struggling so much with being away from family, I would trade it all to live in a little apartment again if it meant that I had family and a close knit circle of friends nearby.

5. I want to be a millionaire
I should have ended with the other one, since it's all sweet and this is materialistic. I don't love money-- in some ways I think I was happier when we had very little of it. But, being a millionaire would allow us the freedom to live: A.) wherever we wanted, regardless of market values, and B.) travel easily to visit our family and friends all over the country. So really this confession goes along with number 4. I don't want money for the things it can buy, but for what I can do, and the people I can spend time with if I had it.

NANOWRIMO count: 17706 (Not enough!)

Thanksgiving

Well, it looks like we will be going to Washington for Thanksgiving after all.

Charming knows how upset I have been over not being able to see my family for the holiday, so our conversation when I called him at work today went like this:

Me: Are you sure we can't go to Washington for Thanksgiving?
Him:We can.
Me: Really?
Him: Yeah.
Me: I love you.
Him: I love you too, that's why I'm doing this.

So Sweet!

I am not looking forward to the drive up there, but am otherwise very excited.

Yea!!!!!!!

Some Random Thoughts

Well, you'll be glad to know, that S seems to have made a full recovery.

(Insert Hallelujah Chorus)

And now a list of randomness.

1. I found myself saying this to E this week: "Yes, it's fun to play trains, but we probably shouldn't play trains naked. Please, let's at least get some underwear on."

2. I have a skin tag/mole near my underarm that looks like this:

My mother is insistent that I get it, and all others like it removed. I am lazy and haven't done it yet. Today in church, S discovered it and found delight in messing with it. I was half scared/hoping that she'd yank it off. I'd put my arm down, and then she would grab my arm again and twist it to get at the mole. I found it cute, in a bizarre sort of way.

3. To get the above picture I stood in front of a mirror with the digital camera. I also said this to Charming, "hey, take a picture of my mole-- it's for the blog." The picture I took is the one you see above, as it turned out better than the one Charming took.

4. One day E was asking us to sing a song about "dooking." We had no idea what dooking was until we realized he was talking about a song called "Do as I'm Doing."

5. Yesterday the children were in the bathroom when Charming suddenly started screaming at them, "Don't do that! Stop that right now!" and he rushed in there. The volume and the excitedness of his voice made me think perhaps our toddlers were playing with knives, or at the very least E was dunking S's whole head in the toilet. I was surprised to learn that they were merely putting their hands in the toilet, and thankfully I had flushed it just minutes before.

6. Earlier this week while on the phone with Daring Young Mom (for probably the third time all week), E put his firehat on top of his battery powered James train. I had to laugh at a plastic firehat just going around the circular track.

7. Does anyone else have a problem with these Bratz Babyz dolls?

I mean, it's bad enough that most of the dolls for girls today are immodest and trendy, teaching kids at a young age to be materialistic and do what everyone else is doing, but these go too far. They are supposed to be babies and their "diapers" look unmistakably like underwear. And they look very un-baby like anyway. So we're not only sending the message to young girls that they need to look pretty and (yikes) sexy at a young age, but that t-shirts and underwear need to be fashionable. Maybe even that t-shirts and undies make an appropriate outfit. Plus, check this out:

This was on a website for them. Does that look innocent and non-sexual to you? Cause it sure as he** doesn't to me! "The Baby Girls with a Passion for Fashion." What the heck? Since when do babies care about fashion? And since when do little girls wear underwear like that? What happened to Disney Princess panties?
Who would buy these dolls for their children?
I am sickened.
Apparently it is never too early to sell sex.

8. I had a cry today. I am majorly bummed that we can't go home and spend Thanksgiving with my family this year. It's a good 10-12 hour drive and the roads are kind of nasty this time of year. I think the thing that upsets me the most is that everyone else around here has plans, because their family eitherlives in the town over, or they only have to drive a few hours to see them. I just wish someone would adopt our family. At least for Thanksgiving, anyway.

9. And so we don't have to end on a sorrowful note-- what is up with those dolls? Please, tell me I am not taking crazy pills here... Is that not just sick and wrong?

Maybe I am crazy

All right I just read some of Daring Young Mom's posts and laughed my guts out. So now I feel a wee bit guilty posting this post, but hey, this is MY blog. No one makes you read it. (Unless you are Charming, in which case you have NO CHOICE.)

So, for those of you who don't know, I have struggled with post partum depression since the birth of my second child, S. It was very much triggered by some pretty crap-ola circumstances. (IE the hub started a new job in suckville 2 days after she was born, I had no car, he worked long hours, no one came to stay with me, S wouldn't go to sleep at night before 1 am and then was up every two hours, and then a couple months later we picked up and moved back to Utah from Washington within a week.)

My depression got really bad when we came to Utah. Mostly because I had lived in Utah for five years while going to school, and always in my mind, was looking to the day when we would go back to Seattle. We lived in Seattle for 8 months before we came back to Utah. I felt like we had failed, and that I had lost my dream. In a sense, what I was experiencing was grief.

So the other day, I was driving through town and I started to feel really good. I felt like this is home, and I am okay with that. I actually kind of like it here. And the funny thing is today in the middle of feeling good about where we live, I started to get serious anxiety. Like I couldn't let go of my depression-- it's been with me for so long, that I wouldn't know what to do if it left. I felt as though I would be losing a faithful friend if I started to feel better. And also, if I started to enjoy Woods Cross, that I would somehow be betraying Seattle and giving up on the hope that we might someday live there again. Is that strange? I should want to be happy where I am at, shouldn't I?

I don't know, maybe I am a looney. Sorry if this is less than upbeat. Just wanted to send it out there.

Croup and Poop

Day 3 of croup-fest '05.

S slept mostly through the night. (insert sigh of relief) She has already had some unreasonable clinginess this morning. Hopefully this does not continue throughout the day like it did yesterday. Crying, crying, more crying. E felt left out so he did some irrational crying too.

Well, we got flu shots yesterday, did some grocery shopping, and cleaned the house (sort of). Lots of cuddles, no writing on the NANOWRIMO. You win some, you lose some.

And now something completely different...

E wears underwear. He is not what I would define as potty-trained. He needs reminders to go, has never taken the initiative to pee in the toilet without said reminders, and pretty much will go in pants without remorse. That said, he will pee in the toilet but will not poop. He usually poops in his diaper at bedtime and then falls asleep in it. Pooping in the toilet is something we have been working on lately:

Me: Are you making poo-poo in the potty?

E: No. I just make pee-pee. I just make farts.

I can't even type that without laughing. We usually don't use that "f-word" at our house, but lately I have let it slip. Needless to say, I found that a three-year old using the word "fart" hilarious. Maybe I'm a bad influence. I'm probably immature. Oh well.

It has taken a long time to type this entry. The croup child keeps needing cuddles....

Croup-dy Doo

S, as I mentioned has croup. The Croup. Seal bark cough and all.

Yesterday consisted of lots of crying, whining, cuddles, calling Charming (does that look like Charmin, to anyone else?) and pulling him out of meetings, a sanity call to Daring Young Mom, and finally a call to the doctor to make an appointment because I had had ENOUGH.

Amazingly enough-- I did manage to make dinner, vacuum and work on NANOWRIMO. (All these things were done while Charming and S were at the doctor's or sleeping.)

After the Daddy-Daughter Duo got back from the Dr's I went to a SHADE clothing party. If you are worried about baring your midriff or showing off too much cleave-- these shirts are for you. Fabulous undershirts that will give you that layered look, while keeping you modest.

The doctor prescribed some steroids for S. They are little pills we have to crush and then sneak into her food. I was up with S every hour for the first few hours of her nighttime sleep last night as it was agreed it was my turn. All things considered, I am doing pretty well today.

Now I think I am off to do a little holiday internet shopping. Including a stop to buy me a t-shirt.

NANOWRIMO count: (Shockingly) 12,479

The Fun Has Left the Building

Every room in my house looks like a bomb site.

I feel icky.

S has the croup.

Yes, folks, the fun has officially left the building.

NANOWRIMO word count: 10,685

Almost Forgot

It is Monday afternoon, and I almost forgot to fess up. I have avoided the internet today, because I had Things to Do.

1.There is a dead fruit fly in my liquid dish soap
It's true. In the snap open lid on my liquid dish soap there is a dead little insect. We have had the soap since before we had a dishwasher-- in our student family housing days. The bug has been in there since at least then-- I'd say 2 years or so. I could get him out, but he's been in there so long. Why bother him?

2. I do not sit right next to the tub when my toddlers bathe
Most of the time Charming actually bathes the kids, so this usually applies to him, but you know how they always say "sit by the tub, never leave the kid unattended in the bath"? Well, I don't. Now, don't call CPS on me! I usually am in the room, or a room away watching them. They just take such looooong baths. Am I bad mom?

3. I like to pop zits
Yes, it's gross. Don't tell me you don't get sick pleasure from it! Remember that kid in high school who had big nasty zits with huge heads on them? You know who I am talking about-- every high school had at least one. I always just wanted to pop those for him. I am sometimes sad that my big zit days are gone-- almost. I think it's kind of fun to pop one of those babies and watch the zit "juice" hit the mirror. Now that you are thoroughly grossed out, I will stop.

That's all I got.

NANOWRIMO word count: 9910

NANOWRIMO

For those of you who don't know, like some of my other blogging friends, I am attempting to write a novel in one month.

It is supposed to be 50,000 words.

Well, an update.

Friday night, 9:54 p.m. I have 6,821 words. I am tired. I am going to bed.

Perhaps a true novelist would stay up late trying to get to her goal of having 8,000 words at this point, but I am a sucker for my pillow. My obsessive need for sleep may just be my downfall. But sleep, sleep I will. Tomorrow I will have another chance to not catch up on my word count, but tonight I must catch up on my zzzz's.

Eat it.

What's this? It's Reenie-Bean eating her soy-nut butter and jelly sandwich (S has a peanut allergy) with a SPOON!

Did you think it was possible?

I just had to take a picture. She loves her utensils so.

Did seeing the word SPOON! up there like that make anyone else think of The Tick?

Candy and the Wisemen

Just now as I was upstairs on the internet, I heard the unattended children move into the kitchen. Faintly, I heard E say, "lots of candy." Yep. Sure enough when I went down there, he and S had gotten into the candy. But I must say, the young prince was kind enough to give his sister a piece first. She had a lollipop (he was helping her throw away the wrapper) and he was going back for his piece.
So I got out the Little People Christmas set today. Last year when E was into names, we taught him the names of all the Little People. Mary, Joseph, Baby Jesus, and the three wisemen-- Balthazar, Ted and Kim. I was very disappointed when I pulled out the Asian wiseman (Kim) and asked E who it was. He didn't know. Sad day! But! Redemption. I pulled out Joseph. Who's this? He knew. He also knew the angel, Mary and the Baby Jesus. I was bummed that he had forgotten all of the wisemen, but pleased that he remembered the most important figures. Good boy.

An Open Letter to My Post-Baby Breasts

Dear Madams,

First of all, I would like to thank you for your usefulness to me these past three years or so. I am ever grateful for your willingness to feed and soothe my two sweet babies. It has been amazing to me, that with minimal effort on my part (save those first initial weeks, sorry about that) you have been able to manufacture delicious and nutritious food for my children. You are wonderful. Thanks for all the hard work!

I would now like to make some suggestions as to areas in which you could improve.

First, I will be ever grateful to you for the boost in cup size I received during my first pregnancy. But I would like to know if you could take the stretch marks back. I no longer want them, and while it is rather exotic, the excitement of having Tiger Boobs, has worn off.

Secondly, I think I would like to start sending you gals memos to let you know when S will be dropping a feeding. This way we can avoid the little "engorgement" issue we've been having lately. I figure if I drop you some advanced notice, then perhaps you won't make any milk when there will not be any customers at the "dairy." I do appreciate your foresight, but I don't like the engorgement.

Which brings me to my third suggestion. Can you two get it together and start communicating with each other? While one of you is busy making milk, the other one seems to be snoozing on the job, and quite frankly I am tired of being lopsided boob lady. Try and keep your production levels equal, so you match each other in size. This will help me in my clothing options, and maintain my "balance," so to speak.

Also, now that S is over a year, do you think you could stop making milk that tastes good? I want her to want to wean herself, and I thought maybe if you made it taste gross, she'd want to quit sooner. Just curious.

And finally, do you think you'll be returning to your original shape and form soon? I mean, I am amazed at your new stretching and flopping abilities, but it isn't that fun to have to hold onto you both when I go down the stairs or run on the treadmill. I am getting a little annoyed with having to pull you out of my armpits, too. You've become semi-inconvenient to me in this way. But I don't want to rush you-- I myself know it is a little hard to get back into shape. I was just wondering. And hoping.

In conclusion, I wish you both the best. You really are doing quite a fine job and I am looking forward to many more productive years together. And if you heed my advice, we may all be happier, and our relationship is sure to improve.

Best Regards,

Your Body

No Place Like Home

I grew up in the Seattle Area. The Eastide as they called it. I loved it. I loved the rain, and well everything about it. I went to college in Utah and when my husband graduated, we moved back up to Seattle. 8 months later, we were back in Utah. I miss my home. My parents don't live there anymore, so I never really get to go back. Today I was particularly homesick. But there is a reason we do not live there. It is so stinking expensive!
So to make myself feel better I am doing this blog entry.

We live in Utah. Our house looks like this:
:
(We have a front yard now, and less people working on our siding :) )
If we lived in Washington, our house would look like this:


Or perhaps this:

(Since all we could afford is the lot!)

But still I miss it. In Seattle it took Charming an hour to get home. Here it takes ten minutes. Traffic here is piddly. Traffic there is a nightmare. I love it here. I love it there. For different reasons. There are a lot of great things there, that I will not mention so I don't feel bad, and there are crummy things here which I won't mention for the same reason. We may never go back there, and that is sad. But when the market crashes, and house prices drop, we are moving up-- because there's just no place like home.

DI Deals

FIVE DOLLARS, People. I bought this for five dollars, and I am now S's new best friend. And it has a seat on the back too, so E can ride as well.